Let me start by saying how much I love Phil'n'Paul and think they're the best sports commentators in the world. But they do have their idiosyncracies. Listen out for the following phrases and score points for each one you hear. (Ok, this isn't strictly 'bingo' but you get the idea...)

1. 'They're going mano a mano' - often used during mountain stages - 10 points.

2. 'He's digging into his suitcase of courage' (Paul) - not heard so far this year. Maybe the riders aren't trying hard enough. And why suitcase?! - 20 points.

3. Paul mixing his metaphors, eg. 'It's like a strawberry in front of donkey' - alright, that's a simile, but you know what I mean - 20 points.

4. Phil refering to a (usually French) rider by the name of his father / older brother, even though the latter hasn't been in the Tour de France for 15 years - 15 points.

5. Phil making a hash of the commentary at the finish and having to re-record it on a poorer quality microphone, with suspiciously accurate judgements about some lesser-known rider and how this will affect the GC - 25 points.

6. 'Look at his face!' (Phil) - he always says this - 1 point.

7. 'Look at his face!' (Phil) - said just as the camera cuts away to a back-marker 'relieving himself' at the side of the road - 100 points.

8. Gary Imlach getting through a link without a knowing smirk or sarcky remark about 'the French' - 1000 points.

I'm afraid there are no prizes, as I couldn't convince Bikehut at Halfords to sponsor it, so it's just for fun. First to 100 points wins! And feel free to make other suggestions...

This morning as I rode in I imagined Phil and Paul doing a commentary on my ride, for some reason I seemed to go faster!

Too funny! (although I really enjoy Phil and Paul). However, you missed "He's turning himself inside out" - again a symbol that all is well with the tour and you're watching an exciting stage. Sadly the Pyrenees were more "He's having a cuban cigar" as half the GC were probably twittering up the mountainside.

 

 

'Absolute chaos' - very common so only 0.01 of a point.

 

'Complete and utter chaos' - less common, so 1 point. 

 

'Tearing himself inside out' or similar - 5 points. 

Best commentators in sport - funds of knowledge between them - brilliant!!

But each year I love the French mis-pronunciations. As they have both covered this race for donkeys years I think these idiosyncracies must be just part of their charm.

Hey this could easily be turned into bingo by having a larger pool of quotes and then we got 6 quotes each at random and print them off.  Then whilst watching we cross off and the winner posts here with their BINGO! 

 

 

I"d like to add :

 "They're like sharks teeth aren't they?" - Phil (delivered from d'Alp circa 1991 referring to the mountains) suggested score 1000 point 

"He's having to dig deep" - Phil (most years) suggested score 1 point

 

'Free to fly' is Phil's latest cliche. Pretty common, so 1 point.

 

Even heard it today, at least twice. What does it mean in the context of a TT?

Every time Paul refers to a bike as a "machine". 1 point

Love you Phil and Paul!

 

Every time Paul says "The sport of professional bike racing" when he could just say cycling = 2 points!

  From Phil -:

"xxx * is having a armchair ride up the mountain today!"

* (xxx fill in name as required!)

 IMHO all the ITV4 tour commentators are excellent, I just cannot imagine watching a tour without them, long may they reign.  

 

 

Paul: "He's gone out like a fire"

What does this actually mean?

misuse of 'literally' 0.5 point

 "he's literally flying up the mountain!"

still it beats DA BONCH any day

 gotta reduce the points on the father for son mistakes, unless they went for 3 unusual middle names and the irish lad is actually called stephen sorry amin nicholas roche

I am rather fond of the phrase  "The Heads of State of cycling.."  this has to be worth 10 points at least.

 

Apologies for going off topic,

Aside from Phil 'n' Paul Bingo, do you think ITV4 could devise a TdF team manager game along the lines of Team Manager for the Premiership football league - just like they do in the newspapers.

We all start off we a set amount of cash with which to create a team and then gain points by how well the riders in our team does on a daily basis through out the Tour.

 

This is the string of posts that has finally pulled me off grid and made me register - excellent carbone!

Phill has occasionally pointed that 'many non-cyclists simply tune in for the stunning scenery' usually in the first week (5 points)

also occasionally noted that 'his legs have gone' or 'he's blown up' on a climb (2 points each)

I've often wondered what the reaction of that portion who just tune for the scenery make of riders blowing up? perhaps they think there's a sponsored team from Al Quaida or that it not the TDF but the Tour d'iraq?