I forgot to mention that the only family I have is my beautiful sister who lives 250 miles away from me. She came to see me when this happened, but she could only stay one night, she had to get home because she has a severely disabled child to look after. As for my friends, I only have two "true" friends, and they have their fare share of problems at the moment and I don't want to burden them with mine.

I have no problem with your comment at all I have had several conversations with woman in the same situation and this is a general held view that they would accept the death of the partner better than been abandoned.Sorry to hear that you do not have any family nearby.Keep posting you will find support on the forum there are some very supportive people on this forum as I have found myself.Good luck

Actually Snow leopard women are no better, my ex tried to influence every women I went out with after she had decided to clear off back to her mother so that her mother could look after the children instead of her, she didn't work.  It was only after my present wife, 28 happy years told her where to get off that she stopped with her spitefull behaviour.  It is an unfortunate fact of life that some people want something, and when they get aren't happy with the outcome.

Hi lija. Just thought I would check in and see how you were doing.

Hi snow leopard,

I'm still numb with shock. I'm trying to get on with things, but it's like I'm on automatic pilot. I can't sleep, and I force myself to eat. I am really dreading Xmas. But at least I will be spendinf time with my sister then.

Thank you very much for asking. I find it really touching that strangers think of me.

Love lija. x    

Nice to see you posting again lija I hope life starts to get a little better for you and as you say you will be in company for xmas,Always keep posting we are here for a response

Thanks davgor, I will try to keep posting. My beautiful sister has just told me that she has bought us a ticket to see Michael Buble in May 2010!! I am soo excited!!! Michael Buble!  

 

Hi Lija,

Great news about Michael Buble.....it's a long time to wait but it will be well worth it I'm sure.  I was thinking about you this week also and wondering how you were getting on.

I do hope that you don't feel that we are all 'strangers' here for much longer as it would be great if you felt we were more like 'forum friends'.    

Anne

it would be great if you felt we were more like 'forum friends'.    

I do! I don't have a way with words like you lovely ladies do! I am truly humbled by all of your replies. I am starting to feel like I know you all. Your posts have meant so, so, much to me. I wish I had the words to explain how I feel. Where's joanna?? She is the one with words? lol. Bless you all!

 

 lija. xx

Hi Lija....that's a really nice post and there really are some great friends and lovely people here. Yes Joanna is so great with words and she always manages to say exactly what I am thinking much better than I ever could.

Anne x

i agree snow think the same seen it many times  keep strong liga you will smile down the road when life gets better than ever

Thank you for your post. It has been just over 4 months since my ex left me, and it really has been the longest, lonlinest time of my life. I feel like I HAVE to smile. I agree with what Collen said today, when she said that a genuine smile shows in your eyes. My close friend and my sister have said I now have "Shark Eyes" where as before they used to twinkle.

It's my birthday a week Sunday (7th March), and it will be the first without him for over 15 years and I am dreading it.

   I  hope you don't think I'm being heartless - I'm really not ,   but I think you should try to look on your birthday in a positive way .  I think you should use that day as the day when you start your new life ,   a life that you've decided will be  a happy  one from now on .

I can imagine that the past few months have been absolute hell for you but I think that now is the time to make the decision to put the past behind you and start living again !   Don't waste any more time fretting over  that  person who obviously didn't deserve you .    You'll probably end up finding someone a whole lot better ,  or  better still ,  he'll find you .  So  go out and enjoy yourself on your birthday and make it the first day of the rest of your life !    

And we'll be here on that day and we won't forget to celebrate it with you -  we may be strangers but we're all just people who have experienced pain and loss , just as you have .  I  really wish you all the best .  I know you don't believe me just now ,  but you WILL be fine  . You just need to  decide to put the past behind you and look to the future !     The time has come to do that !   Hilary  xx  

Aww hilary, you are soooo right.    Thank you so, so much for your post! I will do my very best to make my birthday the first day of the rest of my life!  

Hi Lija

I cannot add anything to what Hilary has said  except what an excellent post it was.I would however like to add my good wishes to you .I hope you can break free from all the negatives in your life and start to enjoy life again.You deserve some happiness

D