Sunday, 5am, hotel "La Source" - report by FIA observer...

Kimi and Lewis enter the last breakfast bar almost together.

Lewis grabs the lead cheese and ham sandwich from Kimi just before the bend before the checkout.

There is too much cheese so Lewis cuts the corner.

Realising that Kimi has been deprived (unfailrly) of cheese, Lewis hands it back to Kimi and tucks in behind him on the run past the sweet pastries.

Weighed down by the weight of the extra cheese, Kimi fails to run past the coffee counter fast enough and Lewis gets to the checkout first.

Fazed, Kimi slips of a spillage of Coke and crashes into the condiments counter, sugar, plastic spoons and (Red) sauce everywhere...

 FIA verdict: 

1) Lewis penalised 25 Tesco Clubcard points for failing to make Kimi a fresh sandwich and for not stopping long enough to wipe the spillage from the floor in front of Kimi before he slipped on it.

2) McLaren given a $100,000,000 fine for supplying normal letteuce rather than ICEBERG letteuce in  the hospitality suite.

What do you mean, "What the heck are you on about? It's all total nonsense!" 

Well, it makes as much flipping sense as Sundays outrageous decision by the FIA...