This is about a little girl who is missing and a family who want nothing more than to have her back.

I admire Gerry and Kate for having such incredible strength. Please give your support and not judgement. I hope they will find answers.

They are good people and good parents. Please stop dwelling on the negatives and send them your love and support instead.

I understand you had a number of your posts moderated for abusive/unnecessary language yesterday.

Please accept that you will encounter people with differing views from your own and if you can't be civil about it they are probably best left ignored.

Everybody is entitled an opinion and I applaude the ITV moderators here for not censoring the viewpoints of the aparent minority. I politely suggest you follow suite in preference to attempting to silence them.

rbelfast:

This is about a little girl who is missing and a family who want nothing more than to have her back.

I admire Gerry and Kate for having such incredible strength. Please give your support and not judgement. I hope they will find answers.

They are good people and good parents. Please stop dwelling on the negatives and send them your love and support instead.

here here, some people can be very cruel and judgemental...

my kids have played outside, out of my sight.....,i have popped into the garage to pay for petrol and left the kids in the car...my kids have gone swimming to the park without me..i have chatted with a neighbour at the bottom of the garden while my kids were in bed..... that doesnt make a bad parent, and it only takes a determined potential abductor a minute or two to pounce..... remember the tot who was snatched out of her bath.!!! while mom was in the house! i say a prayer every day for madeleine and her family.... who am i to cast the first stone.?

I don't think people are being cruel and judgemental when they criticise the McCanns.  I find the idea of them leaving 3 children under five alone for periods of upto 20mins very disturbing.  I think they were extremely naive.  When I heard that Maddie had been crying the previous night and asked her mum why she didn't come when she cried, I couldn't believe it!!  How many warnings do you need before you realise it's not safe to do that.  Maddie and her siblings could have ended up in so many dangerous and life threatening situations - abduction is the LEAST likely thing that could go wrong.

If I'm in the garden with my daughter and I have to go upstairs to the loo, I take her with me and I lock the door behind us.  If I have to pay for petrol I either do it at the pump with my card or I wait until she's not in the car to fill up, if I have no alternative I take her in to pay with me.  My daughter is the most precious person in the world to me, I go to great lengths to make sure she is safe.  Afterall you wouldn't leave your wallet/purse sitting in the car while you go somewhere would you?  So why would you do it with a child?

 As for the tot who was snatched from her bath - that was down to parental mistakes also.  First - the doors were unlocked.  Second - she was left in the bath unattended - everyone knows it's not safe to leave children alone near water - she could have drowned.

I do support the McCanns in their quest to find Maddeline, but I still hold them at least partly responsible for Maddie's pain.

Yes it does only take a few second for someone to snatch your child, but isn't that even more of a reason not to leave your children alone?

It's not about casting stones, god knows the McCanns have paid the price for what they did, but surely you don't want to go through what they are?  Surely you don't want any other family to have to suffer as the McCanns have?   The only sure-fire way of making sure your children are not abducted is to make sure they are accompanied by a responsible adult at ALL times - it's tying but increadibly effective, it costs nothing  and there is nothing better for detering predators or preventing accidents.

 Proper superivison is a much better and cost effective way of protecting children than any Alert system.  Stop these predators from getting to your child in the first place and Amber Alert becomes unnecessary.

Whilst my heart goes out to Gerry and Kate, the facts are that they left the children alone.

In the UK, if you leave your chidren alone in the house whilst you go the local bar/restaurant you'll have Social Services at your door, the children will be taken into care and I think your neighbours will have something to say, I know I would.

What we used to do when on holiday with freinds was one couple look after all the kids for an evening while the others go out and the next night a different couple look after all the kids. You get an eneving child free that way but they are minded.

We never left our boy alone for a minute on holiday, where we went he went. Indeed he was nearly snatched whilst were on holiday in the former Yugoslavia. We got freindly with a taxi driver, met his wife and went for dinner with them. They couldn't have children she told me. She asked if she could baby sit whilst we went out the next evening, we declined the offer. After all we were only on holiday for 7 days, would you trust someone with your son if you'd only known them for a ciuple of days? That night whilst we were asleep, our ground floor room was broken into, my bag was tipped out onto the terrace and we think whoever it was, was looking for my passport with out 3 yeard old on. They would have a to climb over us as our boy was asllep in a single bed in the corner. We visited the taxi driver merely to tell them what had happened and their house was completed closed up, shutters shut, they'd dissapeared. My husband hasn't slept a night through completely since and wake's at the slightest noise and our boy is now 26.

As I say it is tragic and I know they'll have no peace until she is found.

sillycat:

I don't think people are being cruel and judgemental when they criticise the McCanns.  I find the idea of them leaving 3 children under five alone for periods of upto 20mins very disturbing.  I think they were extremely naive.  When I heard that Maddie had been crying the previous night and asked her mum why she didn't come when she cried, I couldn't believe it!!  How many warnings do you need before you realise it's not safe to do that.  Maddie and her siblings could have ended up in so many dangerous and life threatening situations - abduction is the LEAST likely thing that could go wrong.

If I'm in the garden with my daughter and I have to go upstairs to the loo, I take her with me and I lock the door behind us.  If I have to pay for petrol I either do it at the pump with my card or I wait until she's not in the car to fill up, if I have no alternative I take her in to pay with me.  My daughter is the most precious person in the world to me, I go to great lengths to make sure she is safe.  Afterall you wouldn't leave your wallet/purse sitting in the car while you go somewhere would you?  So why would you do it with a child?

 As for the tot who was snatched from her bath - that was down to parental mistakes also.  First - the doors were unlocked.  Second - she was left in the bath unattended - everyone knows it's not safe to leave children alone near water - she could have drowned.

I do support the McCanns in their quest to find Maddeline, but I still hold them at least partly responsible for Maddie's pain.

Yes it does only take a few second for someone to snatch your child, but isn't that even more of a reason not to leave your children alone?

It's not about casting stones, god knows the McCanns have paid the price for what they did, but surely you don't want to go through what they are?  Surely you don't want any other family to have to suffer as the McCanns have?   The only sure-fire way of making sure your children are not abducted is to make sure they are accompanied by a responsible adult at ALL times - it's tying but increadibly effective, it costs nothing  and there is nothing better for detering predators or preventing accidents.

 Proper superivison is a much better and cost effective way of protecting children than any Alert system.  Stop these predators from getting to your child in the first place and Amber Alert becomes unnecessary.

i suppose i come from a school where children are considered precious and wouldnt for a minute think that a prowler was watching my kiddies with plans to abduct one of them, taking my kids to the loo with me would seem a bit extreme and scary for the children,...you can be protective without being extreme, did you play out as a child,without  a parent standing over you? i did, i  went for trips to the park , swimming, ect with the knowledge that you dont talk to strangers..and  only came home when i was hungry... we can all judge but would you ever think that something would befall your babes while sleeping in a time limit of 20 minutes when they were checked,no! maddies abduction was planned and they have suffered enough losing a child,, there but for the grace of God....i know there are predators who will be determimed to do whatever but dont blame the parents of Madeleine, blame the pervert who was determined to take her and succeeded,could happen while you are distracted for just a second,and has done....my thoughts and prayers with maddie and her family.

There is merit in all that has been said before and until you have been through it it is hard to really understand.

I would wish that life could be like it was for Kendra when younger, I was the same. I used to disappear all day sometime on the other side of town. Of course there were perverts and prowlers around then but it just was not the issue it is now. I have 3 young children and although I let them out on their own to play I am careful to go on a wander round the estate every now and again just to check on them. There was an occasion last week were my son decided to go across the "valley" and play at another swing park. I could not find him and was absolutely frantic for the hour it took me to track him down. He was grounded for a day but, hey the sun was shining and it is hard to blame him too much.

I think what I am trying to say is that we have to give our kids some freedom otherwise they are going to turn into molly-coddled, petrified adults who cant interact with others. Although try telling that to the parents of the teenagers murdered over the last few weeks.

No easy answer is there?

Gerry and Kate went off to have a good time leaving 3 toddlers completely on their own. Their actions directly contributed to the abduction. These are irrefutable facts. How on earth can you possibly say they are good parents? I am sorry to be hard but their suffering is a consequence of their own irresponsibility. My concern is not for them - it is for that poor little girl that they let down so badly! All of our positive thoughts and prayers should be directed towards Madeleine! 

I would be more supportive of Gerry and Kate if they had more openly admitted their own culpability but it certainly seems to me, and all of the friends within my own professional community, that they have not been ready to acknowledge their own sorry part in this terrible situation. As a result the wrong message has been sent out to all of those other parents who think that it is perfectly OK to go off and enjoy themselves whilst leaving toddlers completely on their own!

Good positive aspects can emerge, even from the depths of despair and tradgedy, but the chance to do this has probably been lost! Had our legal system been stronger on Gerry and Kate then this may have provided a warning as to the behaviour of parents, in similar circumstances, in future.

I just hope and pray that history does not repeat itself within another family!  

If you think deeply about my comments you will see that the underlying message is positive - not negative! 

 

 

you are a tower of strength my thoughts and prayers are with you x

really believe madeline is alive somewhere..and somebody knows where she is....let  gerry and kate have their baby back, you can stop the pain , someone reading this knows what happened to madeline...  in the name of god get this little girl back to her family.. she isnt dead.. she is living with someone who knows its all wrong... get real and get this little girl back with the family who miss her so much, if you have a concience.. and you must, to want a child, imagine the pain of kate and gerry to lose their gorgeous  child............  bring maddie home..

I am sure that the majority of people have nothing but sympathy for Gerry and Kate and prayers for their peace of mind.  However, they are not the only people who have a child missing, thousands world wide have gone astray. Our thoughts must be given to all anxious and devasted parents.   It is such an emotional subject area, should we be pragmatic and look at the logic of the situation and try to support children worldwide with alarm protocols and regulations? Should we become more sheltering of our children thereby restriciting a healthy growth and balance in adult life?  Should we expect more of policing? Should we demand more deprivation of rights for paedophiles.?  The list goes on and on. The facts are that most parents do not have their children tied to their apron strings 24/7.  We live normal every day lives.  We take chances and risks all the time.

Like many people I lived a life of absoloute freedom when I was a child - and I was a little girl.  Long bike rides with my friends, looking for chestnuts, squirrels, wild flowers and hiding by the river under my favourite cherry tree. Lots and lots of things.  I also took my son abroad with me many times as a child and he was not with me all the time, I also experienced a heart stopping moment when he ws 16 when I searched for him in Athens in the middle of the night (a long story) and then later found him in a bed at the hotel after a friend, without telling me, had picked him up from the airport and taken him there. Never will I forget the heart chilling and mind numbing fear. Where are our boundaries now? The world has changed and parents have limited choices: over protection of the child or stronger policing and legislation. What a future!.

In between times Gerry and Kate will go on fighting because they are 'mummy and daddy' and will look for their wee offspring. They are parents. We can hope, but after this time how futile is that?  Madeleine is hot property and the kidnappers must have looked to their own safety.  We can only hope that bravery and strength will constantly be given to Gerry and Kate and to all parents also suffering world wide.

i am  a mother of 5 children, and last year i went shopping with my 5 children at the supermarket. my husband and i at the time use to share each others cars. however on this particular occassion it wasnt until i got to the supermarket that i realised the push chair was in the back of my other car. i left my children in the car for about 1 minute, in order to walk over and grab a shopping trolley at the time my eldest were 14, 9, 4, and 2. the eldest are twins . in the space pf a minute i returned to my car to see an interfering busy body looking into my vehicle and talking on her mobile phone to which i later discovered was the police. she confronted me and stated the following "i know youve not been gone for long but you really shouldnt leave your children on their own. she then made some other in appropriate comments, and blocked the door to my vehicle, which she was probably trying to do to detain me until the police arrived. this lady claimed she was concerned for my family and tried to make out i was a bad mother.

the reason i left my chidren was because i knew that i could not man 5 children of which 2 were babies/toddlers, and i didnt want to risk carrying 1 child and holding the other child hand and risk either dropping my baby or having my toddler run under a car, which can, and has happened. the problem with this society is that people always dwell on negativity. for everygood thing a person does there will always be a bad thing. only its the bad or negative that get highlighted. in the mcann case after the intial upheaval, the public turned and blamed them for leaving her, rather than look at the fact that the child was missing/ possibly dead. weve all been on holiday, where things are more relaxed, and we are not in our usual pilot mode of our everyday lives. ive often put my children to sleep in their pushchair  while myself and partner sit and watch the evening entertainment. however if i did that at home in a local pub/ bar i would be frowned upon. we all do it, simply because we are on our holidays and that is what the majority of parents do. ive let my children go to kids clubs and run around part of the hotel with their new holiday friends, and im sure everyone reading this can relate to what im saying.. had the mccanns put maddie in a kids club or in the care of a babysitting service, and one of the cares had run off or abducted maddie, they would have been slated for being irresponsible also. how many of us our in a position to check whether half of these people are crb checked like we would most definately do at home .I live in a quiet little cul de sac, and many familys exspecially in the summer walk up to each others drives for a chat. sometimes their children are in the garden or in the cul de sac playing, or maybe inside watching tv.. my point is it could happen to anyone, but it doesnt make them bad people.People need to join the real world and the real lives of the real people trying to live in a selfish evil society where nobody cares about thy neibour, and are quick to voice there opinions in a negative manner. children today are hard work, and demand alot of attention exspecially at a young age.unless you visit the destination where maddie went missing to see where maddie was left sleeping with her sibblings, then we only have the fabricated version of the media to listen to. sometimes when my children put me through my paces i have to walk around the garden to calm down, some days we all get that way.Its hard for young families, exspecially if we hold down demanding jobs, and lifestyles.

give these people a break. theyve been through enough and will live with this for the rest of their days.

 

rbelfast:

This is about a little girl who is missing and a family who want nothing more than to have her back.

I admire Gerry and Kate for having such incredible strength. Please give your support and not judgement. I hope they will find answers.

They are good people and good parents. Please stop dwelling on the negatives and send them your love and support instead.

 

As a mother who has lost a child ( to cancer) I feel for the family not knowing where Maddie is, and not knowing what she has gone through. BUT, my children would never have been left on there own for a second let alone as much as the McCann's. If they had been a family that lived on a rough estate, on the dole, and had gone accross to the local pub or shop for a packet of fags or a drink and something happened to one of their children they would have been treated completely differently than they way they are. That disgusts me. They should have been been charged with neglect or abandoning their children. I can imagine social services in this country if the McCanns hadn't been doctors! But because they are a middle classed family of doctors they were above all that.... You would think with all the education they had that they would have realised that leaving three little ones alone was not the done thing. Just shows you can have brains and no common sense.

I have had three children, and I can say, hand on heart that apart from at night time when we were all in bed, they were ALWAYS with me. When they were small they played in the garden, and I was in the garden or the kitchen where I could see them. If they were in the house they had to play in the livingroom or dinningroom so that I was with them. They never played in the street, there is no need for it, we had a garden, so they were either in our garden or I took them to a friends house and they played in their garden. I remember people tutting when I got the baby out of his pram to take my 4 year old into nursery, they all thought he would be fine in the pram until I came back out... If I had left him and he had been snatched I wonder what the tutters would have said then? Until mine were 13 they weren't allowed to go off anywhere on their own, and then they had to be with a few friends at least. I certainly would never have left them in their beds in a villa while I went off to have a good time without them, after all they were on holiday too.

I took the responsibility of being a parent 100% seriously, shame others don't.

 

Hi just wanted to say if you leave your children on their own in a foreign country nevermind this country your not going to get alot of ppl having sympathy! That child god love her should never have been left on her own...I also feel if this had been a single parent their feet wouldnt have touched the floor. They would have been the chavs from hellsgate. You have a g/p & a heart surgeon who are educated ppl.....But see without commen sence you dont have anything. I am sorry if this offends you, But i must also point out they offend me!!

i see what you are saying, but  one error of judgement  has meant  that this family has been destroyed... so lets leave them to grieve and a witch hunt solves nothing. a little girl is missing and the evil perpetrators are the ones who deserve the hatred and anger that we all feel... lets not forget that the McCanns  are going through a nightmare... and they must ask themselves "WHY" everyday. they could not have envisaged such a dreadful outcome of leaving the children alone but they did and are suffering..lets have some sympathy and support.  and remember that shannon mathews disappearance was instigated by her own mother,, now she deserves the anger that is  directed at the Mc Canns. my heart goes out to them.... hand on heart, have you ever let your kids play in the garden while you are busy doing housework? it takes a second.!